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Life After Murder, Life After Suicide
By Diane Schachter

On July 19, 2005, the unthinkable happened.  Marlyn and Ian Ferguson’s 27 year old son Graeme was murdered.  To lose a child to murder is devastating, and for Marlyn and Ian, moving through this proved to be the biggest challenge of their lives.  Marlyn went through an array of feelings: Shock, disbelief, anger, disappointment, confusion, regret.

Despite her pain, Marlyn was open to talking to others about Graeme’s death.  She found that talking about it eased her pain and gave others who had also lost a child, strength.  Marlyn soon came to realize that although regular grief groups are helpful, there is a unique set of feelings for those whose loved ones have died because of homicide.  Marlyn explains,   “The Homicide Group came out of a need to offer something that wasn’t happening.”  In 2009, through Valley View Funeral Home in Surrey, British Columbia, Marlyn launched support groups for Homicide and Suicide Loss. She can be reached at 604-506-8866. Read more

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COMMENT (1) | grief, healing, murder, suicide
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I Always Will
By Paige Lougheed - 16 Years Old

I was there the night my sister nearly killed herself.

Sitting down on our cushy chocolate brown couch, I clicked half-heartedly through the channels on our old, beat-up box television. The T.V. had been a gift from one of our old friends. At the time I had thought it generous of him to donate an entire TV. to us for no reason– but now as I stared at its rickety frame and poor signal, I wondered if his motivation was really genuine kindness, or him just using our house as storage space.

As the screen flicked from the family channel to the evening news in the living room, I listened through the thin walls of our basement suite to my mother’s and sister’s argument, coming from the bedroom my sister and I shared. Read more

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COMMENTS (5) | anger management, children, communication, parenting, relationships
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Through A Dark Secret And Tragedy To Renewal
By Adam German

I was driving to a Halloween party on the 31st of October 2001, when my cell phone rang.  My stepfather said he had received a call from the police that my mother had been in an accident, and I needed to turn around and head back to the house to pick him up.  From there, we needed to go to a hospital in Pennsylvania.

I knew why she was there, but he didn’t.  According to him, she was in Buffalo visiting family.  According to me, she was in Pennsylvania visiting her lover.  She was cheating on my stepfather, the man who resurrected a sense of family from the debris left behind from my father’s abusiveness and neglect. Read more

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COMMENTS (2) | depression, healing, infidelity, loss, parenting, renewal
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Therapy Dogs Are A Reader’s Best Friend
By Hannah Sutherland

On her regular Friday-morning shift, Katie walks into White Rock Elementary and is greeted by the excited students she has come to help read.

She has two associates in tow – 200-pound, three-foot-tall Chewbacca, whose head could compete with the size of most watermelons, and nine-year-old Dougal, who has been known to sit on students when she senses they are having a rough day.

Despite having a bad back and sight in just one eye – not to mention being a dog – there is no doubting Katie’s ability to engage young learners. Read more

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COMMENT (0) | animal companion, animal training, children, learning
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“Nice To Meet You. I’m Lesbian”
By Reilley Olexson - 16 Years Old

My favourite colour is red. It always has been. My hair has always been curly, and my eyes have always been hazel. I am not a science experiment, or some new invention. Don`t introduce me as if I am some new species you have discovered. To exploit one aspect of who I am to the magnitude of a flying pig, reduces every other ounce of my body. Do not refer to me as “the lesbian”. I would even rather to be referred to as “curly”. Read more

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COMMENTS (6) | empowerment, enlightenment, self realization, tolerance
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Revolution: How Cipralex & I Saved My Life
By Niki Chanway - 17 Years Old

You’d like to think there’s a quick and easy fix to depression. Exhausted, beaten girl that you are, having spent a large portion of your life wiping the metaphorical sweat from your hypothetical brow, you’re wondering why you just can’t access it.

You waste your Friday nights with your knees curled up to your chest.

Your Saturdays, in bed.

Sundays you force yourself to socialize.

Mondays you’d rather do anything than live through the week again.

You suffer. Struggle. Simper. You pretend that nothing hurts; you thrust candy-coated lies into the mouths of the people who love you. If the words seem sweet enough, maybe they won’t notice the limpness in your fingers, your voice, your spirit. Read more

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COMMENTS (35) | depression, empowerment, healing, self worth
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Transformed By The Re-Newing Of The Mind
By Marilyn Hurst

It was a quiet spring day in March 1990, the day my father died.   I had visited him at home just the day before and though it was apparent he was in the last stages of the “disease”, I was still expecting that any time he’d reverse the diagnosis and pull out of this horrible thing that was consuming his life.   His passing hit me so hard I could barely remember to keep breathing myself.

Over the following months, slowly at first then like a speeding train coming at me, the past, present and future closed in and I felt I was staring into a black hole.  I could see no light at the end of the tunnel.   Although it appeared to everyone around me I had lapsed into depression, I knew that a major life-altering event had occurred and the pain was so intense, I wanted to die myself.

I looked at the shambles of my life and realized I’d been sleep-walking through it for the better part of 40 years.  My marriage was only held together because of  our  9 year old son and were it not for my job as a flight attendant, which took me away for long periods every month, I probably would have ended it years before.  This empty void wasn’t just the passing of my father; something within me was desperate to “get out”.  At the time I didn’t recognize this as a symptom of a transformational process that was in the beginning stages. Read more

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COMMENT (0) | inspiration, meditation, self growth, self realization, spiritual
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I Am Sorry To Bother You
By Mike Harvey - 87 Years Young

Dear God,

I am sorry to bother you with a question that may appear silly to you.

The question is this: Is it okay to love a dog more than you do a human being? The reason I ask this is simple. Dogs have always been my very best friends.

As a youngster I was shunted into the background as my parents divorced and then remarried.

I was the excess baggage disposed of by being sent to a boarding school. Read more

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COMMENT (1) | animal companion, loss, relationships
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Life Goes On
By Sean Cameron - 18 Years Old

Everyone says divorce is hard. They have no idea. I remember as a kid hearing about parents getting divorces and getting scared that the same thing would happen to mine. I would see it on the television, or see my friends heading to their father’s house for the weekend. So I made sure I kept a close eye on my mom and dad. I was always on the look-out for any signs of arguments. I would make them promise me over and over that they would never get a divorce. I knew it was immature and silly, yet I couldn’t help but worry. However, my parents always seemed so happy together. And of course, my mom and dad promised me they would never be apart. So what did I have to worry about? I guess even parents can be wrong sometimes… Read more

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COMMENT (1) | divorce, family, healing, relationships, self growth
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My Journey From Chronic Fatigue To Publisher
By Lynn Michell

I had been jokingly told by friends about the shock of the big 40, but no one had warned me about a nightmare scenario that began on that day and continued for fifteen years.

I invited a few friends to a party, and afterwards, several of us came down with the flu. At least, we thought it was the flu. But we did not get better. For eight of us from the same academic department, including the lively American Head of Department and Irish Administrator, what we faced was the long, long haul through a poorly understood illness called ME or Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. Personally I would re-name it No Idea Syndrome because the ignorance and dismissal we all faced from the medical profession was appalling, insulting and hurtful. Read more

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COMMENTS (2) | healing, self realization
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Felix The Cat Part IV: The Grey Dragon
By Melissa Roberts

When my cat Felix decided to tolerate Mum and Dad’s cat Tiptoe in 2010, we had been living there for nearly two years. I never expected Felix to give in, but then again I never expected to lose my job and have nowhere else to go but back where I had come from.

Former stray turned beloved pet, Felix moved with me from St. Louis, Mo to small town Kansas after I lost my job as a hospital chaplain in 2008. My parents and I agreed this would be a temporary situation- six months at the most- until I could get back on my feet. We all overestimated my employability and underestimated the recession. Read more

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COMMENT (0) | animal companion, empowerment, renewal, thriving
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Bipolar Disorder…And Me…Discovered & Embraced
By M. LaVora Perry

For almost 40 years, I struggled with depression and a nagging feeling that something was “wrong” with me.

In 1983, at age 21, I’d dropped out of college because I had been too depressed to get out of bed and attend class. A few months later, I spent seven weeks in a mental hospital because I’d abused LSD and other drugs, including the bottle of antidepressant medication I’d tried to overdose on. The drugs had made me manic and psychotic. I didn’t sleep, I had excessive energy, and I thought God was telling me to do things like set my high school photograph on fire, which I did.

In my mid-twenties, I stopped doing drugs. Read more

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COMMENTS (3) | Bipolar, depression, self growth, self worth, spiritual
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How Smiling Meditation Changed My Life
By Billie Criswell

I have always been the type of person that one might associate with meditation…..or  New Age healing and Eastern healing concepts. I was even, at one time, a self-proclaimed “hippy.” But the truth was, I had never so much as tried to quiet my mind– I was too busy being busy to even ponder the concept of slowing down.

At a certain point, though, it seemed that meditation came to me much as other things had in life: on a whim, as though I invented the concept. Read more

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COMMENT (0) | loss, meditation, renewal, spiritual, thriving
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Inspired By A Life Of Travel
By Debbie McKeown

My passion for travel and outdoor adventure began at an early age. Growing up on my family’s farm in Ontario, Canada, I spent my days exploring the great outdoors and my evenings reading Nancy Drew mysteries and action books that featured lots of horses. Big adventures beckoned. I loved my surroundings but always felt a sense of restlessness and a desire to experience places and meet people beyond our small farming community.

Fast forward many years … with my husband Jack, I have currently visited 43 countries (and counting) and all of the continents. Each destination has left me with a lasting impression of the beauty of the world, whether it be through the landscapes, people or animals. As I consider my evolving travel portfolio, I realize that travel has really shaped who I am today. Read more

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COMMENTS (2) | inspiration, self growth, tolerance
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Expert Series: Family Type-Casting
By Dr. Barbara Sinor

We tend to create similar situations in our lives until we become aware that the same experiences keep “happening to us.” When you recognize a particular negative circumstance seems to repeat itself over and over, or a certain type of person re-enters your life several times to your dismay, take a hard look into your childhood and search for the pattern or script which may be embedded in your subconscious mind which invites the same unwanted experiences into your life. Read more

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COMMENT (0) | family, relationships, self realization
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Expert Series: Midlife Divorce: Blame It On Your Parents?
By Deborah Moskovitch

Your parents’ divorce might be setting the stage for your own.

Shannon*, a 48 year old client of mine, recently explained her “aha” moment when discussing the issues behind her impending divorce. She married her husband because he “completed” her — masking low self-esteem and feelings of not being worthy of love.

It wasn’t until after therapy and introspection that she realized she had fallen into a relationship trap: Trying to fill a void of lost love left by her parents’ divorce, and the loss of a relationship with her mother, when she was just 5 years old. Read more

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COMMENT (0) | divorce, parenting, relationships
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No Arms, No Legs….No Worries
By Nick Vujicic from his Attitude Is Altitude website

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Click on picture above to view inspirational video.

Imagine being born without arms. No arms to wrap around someone, no hands to experience touch, or to hold another hand with. Or what about being born without legs? Having no ability to dance, walk, run, or even stand on two feet. Now put both of those scenarios together: no arms and no legs. What would you do? How would that effect your everyday life?

Meet Nick Vujicic… Born in 1982 in Melbourne, Australia, without any medical explanation or warning, Nicholas Vujicic (pronounced Voy-a-chich) came into the world with neither arms nor legs. Read more

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COMMENTS (2) | inspiration, self worth, spiritual, thriving
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    Mike

    My wife is an alcoholic she drinks liquor from the time she gets up until the the liquor store closes.im at the crossroa...
    April

    I have been married to my alcoholic husband for 11 years but we have been together for the last 19 years. We met at a ve...
    Tina

    I have been married for 22 years. Both my husband and I were casual drinkers. As the years went by we began drinking m...
    Amy Weisenburger

    What a beautiful message!! My fur-babies, soulmates gave my life tremendous purpose and meaning. Their paw print...
    Frank Sterle Jr.

    Whenever I observe stress in the facial expression of my mother, a typical senior, I also observe how that stress drains...
    Kim

    This was an excellent blog. I have been with my alcoholic husband for 15 years. I felt like I was losing my mind with th...
    Alice

    Helping someone with this issue is hard. And even more if you love him. I know that very well. We struggled with it for ...
    Union Alarm

    The best way is to leave such a person as it is not worth making your life miserable with such a person. I know this as ...
    Nancy Flora

    I think what you mean is a non-drinking member of an alcoholic family. Alcoholism is a family disease. Just as your husb...
    Amanda

    The family is waking up Sunday AM and my alcoholic husband again makes another nasty comment to me. The things he has sa...
    Angel

    I learned how to detach from my drunk husband! Than my mother passed away. All gloves were off after that. My son gradua...
    Lorraine

    Married thirty seven and a half years to an alcoholic. But he is a good person. And he does good deeds for everyone neig...
    jw

    I have been with my husband twenty one years. We have three children together, ages 5,7, and 9. He is a functioning alco...
    Richard Berman

    A emotional story well written with bright eye ups and sad eye downs. A story I could relate to. My grandparents would...
    Gina

    Love this. Just what I needed to read. Thank you for your courage to share this....
    Tired

    I am struggling with detaching, but still trying. I have been with my other half off and on for 5 years. The offs were...
    Debra Grossman

    Thank you for sharing this beautiful story. It nourishes my soul to learn of such special friendships. We humans must ...
    Jack russell

    Really enjoyed reading the website. I have also have a website about this great dog....


    Thank God for your blog. After 37 years of being married to an alcoholic,I've finally reached my breaking point. Emotion...


    Thanx 4 da truth...
    Sandra

    I am from USA, i am 36 years old, i want to gladly give My testimony of how a spell caster dr.mac@yahoo. com brought bac...
    g

    Thank you for your words. As I navigate through marriage with children (11, 5, 3) and I am a stay at home mom, the idea ...
    Catherine Ellen Pettway

    My husband and I married in 1988. He occasionally drank beer but not everyday. He came from a long history of alcoholics...
    Nic

    Thank you Mike for your honesty and vulnerability. It helps to feel a connection with someone who understands the enduri...
    Robert Goldsmith

    Thank you for sharing that very intimate experience and your story. I'm married to an alcoholic and am having severe pro...
    MANDI

    Is this group still going? I love my husband and I knew what I was getting into when I married him. I knew he like to dr...
    Kelly

    Dear Keith, I hope you are at peace now. You are missed by many....
    Delilah Campos

    Dear LaVora, Thank you so much for sharing this intimate experience. I am deeply touched and encouraged by your experie...
    Mary Ellen Bennett

    Thank you so much. I am married to an alcoholic and I have watched him go through rehabilitation and relapse many times....
    Tracy

    Thank you for sharing your story with me Ivor. I'm so glad you had a loving supportive Aunt to guide you out from beneat...
    Daniel Fontana

    I know those kids,especially Snezana.Please send me their contact information....
    Neyhaaa

    I can't thank you enough for sharing this. Yet, thank you....
    Amy

    My daughter is five and her dad is an alcoholic. I know we need to leave. We both own our house and I can't afford a law...
    CPC

    I think this is among the such a lot important info for me. And i'm happy studying your article. However want to statem...
    online festival

    Every year, people in India find different ways to celebrate the same festival, and perhaps this adds new dimension to...
    Karol

    Listening to all the mother's on here is overwhelming for me. I think about what all of you are going through and I can ...
    Vicki Osheka

    This is my second marriage and I came from a non drinking family. Didn't realize what I was getting into when I married...
    Elle

    Wel written article. My husband is walking around totally beligerant. Where he ends up making messes, he has snowballed ...
    Maren

    Thank you for this! 3rd day on Cipralex and a glimmer of hope....


    I 'gave in' recently. I am more hopeful than ever that things will improve for me after reading this article. It is insp...
    LindaJane Riley

    I apologize to everyone who has commented. I didn't know this story was still active. I would like to invite all of ...
    Rahulbh28

    Dear Members, Please help me. . . I'm sharing my painful moments which my brother and my family members are undergoing ...
    rene

    Yes i too lived the nightmare for 45 yrs..when in my marriage the last. 10 yrs my alcoholic lived in the same house and ...
    Grace

    I typed in Google search, overcoming childhood loneliness because I am paying attention to some habits that I have been ...
    Casadina

    I am so thankful that I found this website. I am like others on here and my alcoholic is passed out snoring again. This ...
    Grateful

    I cannot express how much I appreciate your story. I have been with my alcoholic for 11 years and I do not even know my...
    Vic

    I stumbled upon this beautifully written article because I just "gave in" today. I just picked up my perscription of cir...
    Carol

    I have recently begun to admit that my husband is an alcoholic. My heart is broken... I am pissed... I have so many emot...
    TJ

    Thank you for this article. You are the first person who seems to understand why I am still married to an alcoholic. I...
    sariah

    I wept as I read your story. I am currently learning to detach as well after 20 years of marriage to an alcoholic. Leavi...
    LaVora

    Good luck, N. My experience may not be yours. However, I deeply believe that happiness is our birthright. You deserve th...
    nk

    Lavora, I am exactly here in my marriage - trying to turn it around. Rgds, N...
    Suzanne

    Hi Martin and Cathy. Watched your documentary. You are a wonderful family. Everyone has their struggles, no one is exemp...
    admin

    Thank you for letting us know. The link is now set to the their new WEB page. We have our dog from them....
    Linda Jane Riley

    About a year ago I was forced to take a step back from all things related to alcoholism. My husband, Riley, was not drin...
    SHerry

    Your link to the rescue adoption site is for sale with no other info on the dogs....
    Karen Rago

    I think that Jesse is the most adorable jack Russell terrier dog I love watching his videos to...
    Marleen

    Thank you for sharing your story! That's real inspirating!...
    Julie

    Its 4:50am here. I can hear him snoring in the nursery. I brought the baby to bed with me.. He only snores when he drink...
    ld

    I thought I was suffering alone. The advice and comments make me feel better and gives me the strength to go on. Keep th...
    Sam

    Hi Mike, Very poignant, "There are no grown-ups. We are all children in adult garments" is right on the mark. Sufferi...
    TJ

    Thank You!!! Like "judy" commented above my mind was racing and I felt out of control... My life seemed to be falling a...
    Karunakaran

    It's very nice....
    judy

    Thanks for ur writings... it really help my mind to calm down.... where can i go to talk with alot of nonalcoholics??? N...
    Tanya Sousa

    We certainly do have to change the way we respond, don't we Paul? I'm encouraged though. I do see it happening -- althou...
    Paul Trainer

    Thank you, Tanya, this is all so true. As someone who adores starlings too, I know that it is only when you take the tim...
    Cathy

    In reading I see how difficult it is to be married to an alcoholic husband for 30 years and have now discovered that if ...
    carrir

    You took the words right out of my mouth. Xoxo...
    ceri

    What an amazing story of love between step son and step father...
    Caney Texas

    Hello! I've been reading your site for some time now and finally got the bravery to go ahead and give you a shout out fr...
    julie

    what a wonderful article, she described me to a tee , it was nice to put words to the feelings , I am new to cipralex bu...
    michele

    I am hurting so badly right now, it is taking all the strength and coping ability I have just to get through the day! O...
    denise morini

    PLEASE understand that I do not feel redeemed......still...........getting Lexi DID NOT make up for what I did to Jack, ...
    Carleen Quesenberry

    Denise- It is perplexing that you would write a "feel good" story after you abandoned a dog due to your failure to trai...
    Jon

    While I love the article, I caution those reading the post by "finally AM, me." I was in a relationship for 12 years to...
    Wendy Noer

    I felt like I was there, good story Melodee, keep writing. Let me know when you finish another one....


    thank you...
    Sandi

    This is great, Mel! Congratulations! I hope to see more of your writings - especially the novel you're working on......
    Katie

    My name is Katie. I'm 40. I have only visited your website, haven't purchased your book yet. I've been diagnosed bi-...
    Kaylee

    Your story helped convince me to start retaking my cipralex! Thank you!...
    gautam khanal

    Love actually does not have any boundary of Cast,Religion,Profile,Species,Class etc........
    Nayanna Chakrbarty

    Dear Kalpana, Thank you for your kind wishes. I do agree with you, when you think you are all alone that's when He ma...
    Kalpana

    Dear Nayanna, It' such a pleasure reading your experiences with Ganapthi (as I call him). He is so close to my heart ...
    Haley

    Made my day we have no reason to complain bout anything...
    Melissa

    Sorry typo , thank you again ......
    Melissa

    Thank you , LindaJane; I will consider joining. Thank you against for your response .. Be well Melissa...
    Linda J Riley

    UPDATE -- Since I wrote this story, I have created several support groups: Two on Facebook and one on an independent sit...
    Melissa

    For 20 years that had been my life! This last time was so bad , he attacked me then choked his 19 year old twin daughter...
    Steve Sumii

    Joe, What a beautiful story. I visualized the whole story. The ending where you walk with your dad was especially moving...
    JW

    The story now the subject of a documentary aired on Knowledge Network. Video can be seen online at: http://knowled...
    http://tinyurl.com/kovalane39421

    I really would like to book mark this blog, “Turning Trash Into Beauty – Kat Nicotera’s Unique Art Therapy | Thri...
    joybells

    wow. i am going through the same journey! thanks for helping me & assisting me with that journey!...
    Noelle Sterne

    Fangfang-- You have been blessed with a husband and parents who understand that nothing is wasted. And you have learn...
    Fangfang

    Wow ... what a strong and passionate article!! Really?? Nothing is wasted?? I am feeling like I have wasted my life for...
    Pushpa Rawat

    sooo lovely and feel of very true friendship forever...
    Tanya Sousa

    Hi Diane! I'm so glad you enjoyed it. I was so blessed to have her in my life AND to have the parents I had. Also, gr...
    Joyce

    Billie, I found your story very interesting and well-written. Some people would have been judgemental about the conditio...
    Diane

    Shiri, your article is very interesting and brought tears to my eyes. I have been a dog parent/companion to many wonder...
    Diane Schachter

    Tanya, I so enjoyed reading the story of your dog sister. I love how you describe your adventures and relationship with...
    Acamea

    Thank you James. :-)...
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